Well, it's been an interesting couple of days....I think I' m finally cluing in to the fact that God is trying to teach me something here. I think I've somehow gotten sidetracked with number and symptom watching, that I've taken off with ideas in my own head about what's going on with this pregnancy, and that I've forgotten how to trust. Trust not only the doctors that are caring for me and their expertise, but more importantly trusting in the One who created these lives in me (mine and Lydia's) to begin with.
Here's what we know:
#1, the contractions I had yesterday were purely brought on by the UTI. How do we know that? Because it's been proven that UTI's do that in pregnant women and my cervix has remained unchanged despite the tremendous contractions I was having.
#2, for many, many weeks now, my cervical lengths have not changed. To have a cervical length of 30mm at 30 weeks is wonderful! To have been at 30mm for over a month, even better.
#3, Fetal fibronectin tests -- which I've now had done twice -- show no signs of preterm labor. Websites vary on their estimates but the consensus I've read on many websites is that I have less than a 5% chance of labor setting in within 2 weeks.
As the day has worn on, I'm becoming more and more comfortable with this information. I was NOT a happy camper after leaving the drs office today and my attitude is just now starting to improve after I've vented my frustration on my poor husband. I'm still nervous -- the preterm labor specialists I've been seeing are officially passing me off to the diabetic specialists. No more preterm labor clinic means that no one will be checking my cervix for probably 6 weeks or so. And a lot can happen in 6 hours, much less 6 weeks. This is where I need to let go, I think, and trust. The diabetes does seem to be what's going to get the best of me the remainder of this pregnancy. #1 complication of gestational diabetes is big babies. And Lydia is just that, weighing in 4 pounds, 12 ounces per the ultrasound estimate today. That's nearly a full 3 weeks ahead of schedule. That's like the 95% percentile on fetal growth charts. The fear I have now is that she'll get so big, my uterus will decide "this must be a full-term baby" and kick her out! (Happens to mothers with multiple babies all the time -- combined weights of multiples adds up to what 1 full-term baby would weigh, not to mention the uterus not being able to stretch anymore, and they go into preterm labor.)
So, I'm still not sure which end is up but I'm trying to focus on being thankful that I've made it to the 30's in weeks, that even if she comes tomorrow, she's had steroids to mature her lungs and we wouldn't have to worry so much about her survival, barring any unforeseen illnesses/infections. So now I have to focus even more so on my diet and my sugar levels and somehow, find a way to put preterm labor fears aside. Boy, this is going to be an interesting month or so!
(Short-term -- the steroids they've given me to mature her lungs will mess with my sugar levels so if I find myself going over 180 in the next few days or so, I'm instructed to call immediately to go in for an insulin drip. We'd appreciate your prayers!)