5/19/09

Strong words

This morning was crazy! Let me try to be brief but give you the back story (unless you'd like to go back through the blog posts to Timothy's birth?....Didn't think so). So Timothy failed his hearing tests in the hospital. Once that happened, I began receiving phone calls from *someone* claiming that they followed infants with hearing loss in Franklin County. This person (who's name I did not write down) called me periodically throughout Timothy's first 9 months as we were still wading through different tests & procedures trying to get to the bottom of things and reach a diganosis. Once Timothy was officially diagnosed with hearing loss in the fall, this person said she'd turn me over to *someone* who would start the process to set Timothy up with help such as speech therapy. This new person (who's name I didn't write down) called me in February which was not a good time with Lydia coming. I asked her to call me in April, which never happened, so I started contacting people on my own last week. I don't think I've found the right *someones* but.... This nurse I talked to last week said she was with the BCMH (Bureau for Children with Medical Handicaps) which, she explained, was basically a supplemental insurance program that would help direct us to the appropriate drs and therapists and pick up where our insurance left off, financially speaking. Said that she and another woman, a rep for "Help Me Grow" (an "early intervention" program offered to all children in Franklin County who have "handicaps") would need to come out to see Timothy and fill out the paperwork. That was today. And I was left reeling. My mother's heart was broken. Their words were very strong.... Words like "handicapped" and "developmentally delayed" and "MRDD" (Mental Retardation & Development Delays) and "special school" and "sign language". They kept talking about how far behind Timothy was. It was almost more than I could bear. There is NOTHING wrong with this child! Sure, he has MILD hearing loss in his left ear but -- and anyone who's ever spent time with Timothy will tell you -- he does JUST FINE even without his hearing aid in! He doesn't yet use words nor does he walk but he's only 17 months old! He's still got time, right? As far as Timothy goes (and there's more not having to do with Timothy), he will be evaluated very soon by a group of therapists (speech & language, phsycial, occupational, etc) who will evaluate him in EVERY area (neurological, social, emotional, vision, hearing, speech, motor skills, etc) and will recommend a course of action. The nurse was just killing me with suggesting that Timothy need all these different types of therapy. "Okay, lady," I though to myself, "I just called you to get him speech therapy not for you to come into my home and tell me all the things that are wrong with my child!" *sigh*

But, wait -- there's more! While the nurse was finishing up and the rep from Help Me Grow was taking over (she was not a nurse, by the way), I noticed that the nurse was talking to John. In a few minutes, she asks me if John was in speech therapy. I told her no and she said "Well, I can tell he's behind in his speech". WHAT?!?! Are you kidding me?!?! No one, and I mean no one -- not 1 Sunday School teacher, not 1 nursery worker, not 1 relative, not 1 anyone has ever said to me that John is difficult to understand the way this lady was making it sound (all 4 year olds are difficult to understand at times by those not close to them, right?)! She said I was unlikely to "see" it because I was his mother. While I was trying to let that go AND deal with the whole Timothy stuff, she then turns to Elizabeth to say good-bye. Then she stops and asks Elizabeth to look at her. "When was the last time Elizabeth saw an eye dr?" she asks. "She's never seen an eye dr," I reply. "Come look, Mom," she says. Elizabeth's left eye drifts in toward her nose when she focuses on your face.... I've never noticed it before but I did, indeed, see it happen. Fantastic! She then said she was leaving without looking at any other children and I actually replied outloud "Yes, please!". "I'm sure I'll hear from you soon," she said....

I guess I should be glad it's time for their birthday check-ups?

3 comments:

Charissa Pituch said...

Wow, I am so sorry you had such a bad experience. So much for helping you feel better about helping your children.

The Mrs. said...

Wow - sorry soo much bad 'news' at once! Hopefully they were just being OVERLY cautious with all the kiddos! John really isn't any harder to understand than any of the other younger mission friends we had in there tonight. I tried to pay extra attention since you had posted this today. Praying God's strength for you.

Hughey Mews said...

Case workers are overly zealous for the most part. Social services can be helpful but they can be intrusive. Just make sure you get the kids their check-ups with good docs (eyes, dental, medical) and you should be fine.